When I told y’all that I was on Twitter, I warned you that I had a limited number of topics to tweet about, with a favorite being “I can’t sleep.” Not long ago, after I tweeted an insomnia complaint, gorgeous blogger Gnarlitude Jen tweeted back a quote from former Gucci designer Tom Ford: “Bedtime ritual:…
insanity
How to Get Out of Jury Duty
I must thank gorgeous blogger The Perfect Ratio for finding and sharing this wonderful juror qualification questionnaire. “I want a donut now, you fuck!!” is going to be my new personal motto. Click to enlarge I’ve been called for jury duty more than anyone else I know. This irritates me because I’ve done my time….
Not Lovin’ It
On Monday, McDonald’s reported fourth-quarter earnings that beat analysts’ expectations. I hope you click the link in the first sentence because I put some effort into finding the right earnings story for you. A lot of the headlines on the McDonald’s stories out there just said earnings fell almost 23%. That’s true, but the fact…
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
I had a great time last night thanks to my gorgeous friend Jen, who invited me to her family’s annual outing to Carnegie Hall to see “1964…The Tribute,” an unbelievably realistic-sounding Beatles tribute band. If you closed your eyes, you’d think it was the real thing. And, if you opened your eyes (which I’d recommend…
Online Shopping Sadness at eLuxury
WWD is reporting that eLuxury.com is shutting down the retail part of the site over the next six months and will continue as an online magazine. Oh noes! I love that site. The spokeswoman at LVMH, which owns eLuxury, apparently took a hit off her bong and, while exhaling, claimed that the closure is “not…
Having a Wank
I took guitar lessons for eight years. I didn’t become proficient because I never practiced. I would get out my candy-apple red Fender Strat exactly once a week when I trudged the ten blocks to see Ed, my good-natured guitar teacher. I kept this up until I left the corporate world and started working for…
I’m Only Anti-Work
Reading gorgeous blogger Miss Karen’s I’m Not Anti-Social, Just Short-Sighted blog has caused the Officer Krupke song from West Side Story to become permanently lodged in my head. I sing it to myself every time I read her blog. A clip from the movie version of West Side StoryMiss Karen’s line comes at 4:35 Damn…
Happy Holiday, Jews!
Hanukkah isn’t over yet and I figured since I did a holiday post for the goyim, the Jews should get one too. Thanks to La Belette Rouge for pointing out this parody of Light My Candles from Rent. When I watch one of these things, I’m never sure which makes me laugh harder — the…
Happy Holiday, Goyim!
Every December 25, I get into the holiday spirit by reminiscing about an idiot I knew in my freshman year of college. This self-described born-again Christian once went into a rant about the secularization of Christmas as symbolized by the use of “Xmas.” She thought that evil secular people had X’d the “Christ” out of…
Marc Jacobs Hates Me
Marc Jacobs is trying to drive me crazy. Here’s the evidence. Photo borrowed from the sexy bitches at The Fashion Time Magazine,who borrowed it from the sexy bitches at Harper’s Bazaar,who didn’t borrow it from anyone. Remind me to avoid shaking his hand. UPDATED TO ADD: I just got the January issue of Harper’s Bazaar…