Two of my favorite people together: my gorgeous friend Kara Baby and Law & Order SVU‘s Detective John Munch (Richard Belzer). Sorry I stole your Facebook photo, Kara Baby. I couldn’t help myself. UPDATED TO ADD: Kara Baby (aka Finn the Pug in the comments) notes that Munch KISSED HER HAND! I’m swooning.
TV
Do You Want It Wrinkly or Ignorant?
A few months ago, someone submitted a comment to this blog accusing me of being a “wrinkly slut.” My first reaction was to say, “Mom, that’s the pot calling the kettle black!” I kid, I kid. My mother is smooth and chaste. In reality, my first reaction was to say, “‘Wrinkly Slut’ would be a…
Zang Toi, Now in Cartoon Form
I previously mentioned that my designing friend Zang Toi made a guest appearance on The Real Housewives of New York City. Thanks to that, he’s now in cartoon form in this Real Housewives parody. I want all my friends to have cartoon alter-egos!
Join My Fan Club
At the Independent Fashion Blogger meetup in New York last month, a gorgeous blogger nagged me to set up a Facebook fan page for my jewelry line. I think it might have been Vyque. If it wasn’t Vyque, I’m blaming her anyway. I reacted to this idea about as well as Dee from What’s Happening…
Just Dicking Around
Comedian Roseanne Barr (as she formerly was known; now she is just “Roseanne“) had a great line: “People say I should be more feminine – well, they can suck my dick.” Here’s some more dick for you. Tricky Dick Dick in a can Dick in a box Dick Cheney on Family Guy Kathy “Knock the…
Rub Me the Right Way
Here is a preview of my newest jewelry design. It’s a genie in a bottle, available as a necklace or as cufflinks. This is a picture of the cufflink version, showing the silver “bottle” with its black pearl stopper. © Wendy Brandes Here is the cufflink in action on my gorgeous father’s sleeve. GeorgeB’s new…
How to Get Out of Jury Duty
I must thank gorgeous blogger The Perfect Ratio for finding and sharing this wonderful juror qualification questionnaire. “I want a donut now, you fuck!!” is going to be my new personal motto. Click to enlarge I’ve been called for jury duty more than anyone else I know. This irritates me because I’ve done my time….
The Fightin’ Walrus
My almost-husband Paul McCartney is on my good side today, thanks to his appearance on The Colbert Report. Some viewers are on my bad side for their online comments saying that almost-MrB didn’t “get it.” WTF? I’m resigned to people having poor reading comprehension but poor TV comprehension is a new low. As you’ll see…
Better to Have Loved and Lost
Why didn’t you bitches tell me that my 60-year-old, African-American identical twin was on Jimmy Kimmel Live? I would have skipped a Law & Order rerun or ten to check out security guard Veatrice Rice, whom I discovered only after she died of cancer. Someday, I hope to be remembered as Jimmy remembers Veatrice while…
Having a Wank
I took guitar lessons for eight years. I didn’t become proficient because I never practiced. I would get out my candy-apple red Fender Strat exactly once a week when I trudged the ten blocks to see Ed, my good-natured guitar teacher. I kept this up until I left the corporate world and started working for…