Wendy Brandes Jewelry Blog

Never Is the Next New Thing

Eyes on the Prizes

by

My peeps, take a moment to visit Grant Miller Media and vote for me in the Drysdale Awards. What are the Drysdale Awards, you ask? Well, they’re like the Oscars for bloggers, meaning that the winners will accept their awards while wearing sweatpants and t-shirts with week-old tomato-sauce stains on them rather than gowns and tuxedos. I’m up for awards in two prestigious categories: Blog With the Most Pictures of the Blogger and Blog With the Most Swears. In other words, the Drysdale organization thinks I’m fucking vain! Well, this post is designed to encourage you bitches to vote for me in both categories.

I’m sure y’all have noticed that I wear red lipstick nearly all the damn time. I do make exceptions when the clothing calls for a lighter lip, especially if someone else is doing my makeup for me and can do the whole miraculous eye and skin stuff that makes light lipstick look better. Here are some previously posted examples of non-red lips.

Last month, at the Committee to Protect Journalists dinner, with gorgeous client Melissa
On Halloween, dressed as postmortem Anne Boleyn
In May, wearing Zang Toi and looking Picasso-esque
Flashback to 2002: Fake hair and light lips

Anyway, I was so pleased with the lip color from the CPJ dinner last month that I decided to try it out with my everyday black t-shirt, jeans and heels combo. First, I discovered it is very difficult to take a close-up photo of one’s own lips. This is the best I could do.

These are my lips.
 The lips on my face, you fucking pervs!

Then I discovered that while the light color made my lips more luscious, I felt washed-out and boring. It was like there was no exclamation point to my appearance, and I’m used to an exclamation point, dammit. When I met my gorgeous, red-lipstick-wearing sister, Terri Berry, that night for dinner, she suggested that it might have worked better if I had taken the damn time to do a little more with my eye makeup, but I was all like, “Fuck that shit.”

Here’s the head-to-toe photo from that night. I kind of love it that this look would be a total mindfuck for How Not to Look Old author Charla Krupp (Am I the only one who thinks she looks just a tad older than she is? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?) On the one hand, she would approve of my lipstick. Trading red lipstick for boring pink with gloss is one of her fetishes. On the other hand, I’m sure she and other Fashion Police-type bitches would shit themselves over the fact that I wore cropped (well, rolled-up) pants and booties — totally breaking up the line of my leg and making me look stumpy. The horror!

I felt good except for the lipstick issue.
Michael Stars t-shirt
Acne Jeans
Nine West lace booties

So that’s that. No more light lipstick for casual evenings out. I’ll be posting on a new red lipstick soon. While you eagerly await that post, don’t forget to go to Grant Miller Media and vote for me in the Drysdale Awards’ vanity and cussin’ categories (hey, this is my 140th post with a photo of me in it). As always, I am eternally fucking grateful for your support.

UPDATED TO ADD: What the fuck? I am way behind in the swearing category.

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  2. Voted.

    I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of you posting the pic of you at the journalists’ dinner. You look beautiful in that dress!

  4. Hi there-I’ve just voted both categories my dear-good luck!! I love both lip looks, you’re just adorable whatever colour you choose!

  6. Done! I’m sure you’ll be accepting your award in kooky Prada shoes rather than stained sweats, though. 😉

    And ooh, I can’t get used to the pale lip colour (although you look great with pale or red lips)! I’m too used to the exclamation point I guess.

    Ah, and one last thought to finish up the most random post comment ever: The picture of you with fake hair and light lips is vaguely reminiscent of J. Lo back in her On The 6 days.

  7. You do look a lot more casual without your red lippie. Not that more casual is necessarily a bad thing, it’s just strange to see you with pink lips..

    PS: Ditto to quoththeraven, it’s gorgeous.

  8. Hahahahah that contest is too hilarious! I voted for you with gusto. I probably wouldn’t have before this post, but you showed true dedication.

  9. I’m a beige lipstick wearer, and I always wear a ton of black panda eyeliner – I think it’s a one or the other type proposition, and when the lips are lighter the eyes must be darker.

    I’m pretty sure I break every single rule in that damn book every day of the week, and since at this wedding I went to on the weekend a 19 year old girl thought I was no older than 25 (and I’m almost 37)- I declare those rules to be pure crapola. You look awesome!

  10. Done! Although I doubt you’ll be winning the Blog With the Most Swears award. Calling us bitches ain’t enough to win you all the votes you need! You need to step it up!

  14. Done, and done—last night. You’re deffo the rightful winner in the “Swears” and “Photos” categories, and maybe a few (unnamed) others.

  19. 1. I believe I forgot to mention how incredibly STUNNING you look in that gold dress.

    2. Will vote for jewelry. Ahem, kidding. I already voted:)

    3. The last photo in this post = proof that booties and cropped pants can look fantastic. Those fashion police bitches are clearly involved in a worldwide conspiracy to cramp your style.

  28. Miss Wendy MAY have more self-pics posted then Miss J, but Miss J definitely has far more swears. (Please refer to any of Miss J’s workplace rants for proof. Just sayin’.) Miss J will vote for Miss Wendy but fucking try harder, bitch, if you wanna take this honor next year.

  29. You’re such a beyotch, I have to meet you in NY.

    When wearing light lips, your punctuation is your EYEBROWS, Wendy B. Your eyes are just as gorg as your lips.

    I hate to break up my legline!! Crops and boots??? ARGHHHH!

  31. Psst…the “Brittany” comment is me…just realized I was signed into my friend’s account. And now she hates me.

  32. but what about all the people you’ve inspired to say fuck in your comments? it’s fucking wrong, and i’m leaving to go vote.
    and i think you look great in light lips.

  33. I’m voting for the switch you wore in ’02…In my world a switch has never gone out of style but based on your pic I’d say it needs some serious fash lovn’

  35. well, I think you are winning at least the sweary catagory. But I didnt bring my glasses downstairs.

    Well done on being nominated in the two best catagories.

    xx

    (and fuck those cunts if you don’t win)

  36. No no no, I will ensure you get that fucking prize. No, BOTH fucking prizes. Voting immediately.

    About the lip color, I like the red on you. Much more glamorous. Screw that old bitch that wants you to trade for pink gloss.

    wow. that felt good.

  39. I fucking voted for you because you totally rule. I have to agree with your sis, light lips = dramatic eyes but you really rock that red lipstick so I’m hanging for your recommendation 😀

  40. aww i imagine it’s hard to break a red lipstick habit! luckily you look great wearing it!

  41. (R)evolver74, thanks! I've worn that dress before but this was the only time people have described it as being sari-like, and multiple people did so. Weird.

    Quoththeraven, cool. Now when I don't have anything better to post I'll just put that picture up again.

    Alicia/InstantVintage, dude, thanks!

    Sharon, you are always so fucking sweet. I guess nothing interesting came in the mail yet?

    Nadine, thanks! I love wearing it.

    Lisa, I always appreciate a J.Lo comparison. She's got it going on.

    Shannon, yeah, I didn't feel like myself.

    Daddy, I'm glad I earned your approval.

    Skye, holy crap! You're 37?!

    Evie, you're fucking inspirational. I will try harder, you delightful slut!

    Songy, tell all your friends and family to vote too.

    McGone, it's not a party unless I'm wearing fake hair.

    Couture Allure, thanks, damn you!

    ENC, "most spelling and grammatical errors"?

    Thanks, MissC.

    Maegan, I appreciate your damn vote.

    K.Line, I figured it was time to let my inner narcissist out.

    CDP, thanks, you shit-kicking bitch!

    Kori (1) thank you (2) the bribe is in the mail (3) I thought I was just paranoid but what do you know — the world IS against me!

    Grant, I suppose I owe you sexual favors now. Damn!

    Issa, thanks.

    Iheart, I had a moment of thinking "wasn't there a cartoon…?" before realizing I was thinking of Ren & Stimpy. Not Stumpy.

    Apricot Tea, thanks, bitch!

    Cybill, that made me laugh out loud.

    Duchesse, Who is Grant Miller? You mean you don't know? Well, Grant Miller is…um….he is definitely….well, who knows. But he may award me a stupid prize so we like him.

    Isabel, the only position I will run for is Benevolent Dictator of the World.

    Tessa, I like someone who votes along party lines.

    MissJ, I confess, I haven't been swearing as much as I should be. Shit.

    Karen, you BETTER meet me in New York.

    Clothes Horse, going around impersonating people, are we?

    Herald, I feel good knowing the world is a more obscene place due to my efforts.

    Imelda Matt, gimme some fake hair and I'm a happy camper.

    PF, Fuck yeah!

    Hammie, now THAT'S some language I really appreciate.

    MP, I'd like her to shove her pink gloss where the sun don't shine.

    Siljes, why, thank you!

    KD, a report will be coming soon.

    MissK, back when I was a teenager I had the patience to do my eyes but somehow I just can't bear to work on it anymore. I need you to come over and do it for me.

  47. I voted! You ought to win both of them, hands down, WendyB.

    Call when you can, all’s well here.

    We’re getting ready for predicted extremely cold weather, but we’re fine right now!

  49. I have to apologize for misunderstanding your blog. When I saw that you were nominated for the Most Swear Words category, I wondered, “How much swearing could a blog about jewelry and pretty pictures have?” I’m going to have to read more often.

    Also, I might like to order some giant, ’80s-style earrings. Hot pink dangling words – the right one should say FUCK and the left one should say YOU.