I’m devastated that I received a mere honorable mention in the race for the second annual Drysdale award for Blog With the Most Swearing. I was hoping to be a two-time winner in this category, but gorgeous blogger Gwen from Everything I Like Causes Cancer beat my ass. To Gwen, I say, “Congratulations!” and “Fuck [...]
There is only one day left to vote for me in the “prestigious” Drysdale Awards at Grant Miller Media. (UPDATED MONDAY: POLLS ARE CLOSED, BUT READ ON ANYWAY). I am nominated for Blog With the Most Swearing, Blog That is Clearly Contracted to Endorse a Product or Service, and Blogger of the Year. I am [...]
Continue reading about Why Don’t You Choke on a Fashion Accessory?
As I’ve been telling y’all, I have been nominated for three “prestigious” Drysdale awards: Blog With the Most Swearing, Blog That is Clearly Contracted to Endorse a Product or Service, and Blogger of the Year. I deserve to win all three. Not only do I swear plenty myself, but I have created a product that [...]
Continue reading about Buy It Now: Wendy Brandes Swear Rings
Last year, after winning both my categories (Blog With the Most Swears and Blog With the Most Pictures of the Blogger) in the “prestigious” Drysdale Awards thanks to an exhausting and exhaustive campaign, I had a Shermanesque attitude about potential future Drysdales. “I will not accept if nominated and will not serve if elected,” I [...]
Life Magazine, the photojournalism magazine, was launched as a weekly publication by Time Magazine owner Henry Luce in 1936. When I worked at People Magazine, which was started many decades later by the same corporate parent, I was based in the Time-Life building.
The weekly version of Life was shut down in 1972, but the magazine [...]
It’s always fun to dress up for New York Fashion Week. In addition to the two tartan dresses I wore on Friday, I’ve worn dresses I’ll describe as new-old, old-old and new-new.
For Fashion’s Night Out, I went with new-old. This Ossie Clark dress was made more than 30 years ago. I won it on eBay [...]
I must thank gorgeous blogger The Perfect Ratio for finding and sharing this wonderful juror qualification questionnaire. “I want a donut now, you fuck!!” is going to be my new personal motto.
Click to enlarge
I’ve been called for jury duty more than anyone else I know. This irritates me because I’ve done my time. In 1996, [...]
Dysphemism (noun): the substitution of a disagreeable, offensive, or disparaging expression for an agreeable or inoffensive one. The antonym of “euphemism.”
Example: “Have a good day, bitches!”
*Brought to you by Wendy Brandes, dysphemistic since (approximately) 1977.
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Why didn’t you bitches tell me that my 60-year-old, African-American identical twin was on Jimmy Kimmel Live? I would have skipped a Law & Order rerun or ten to check out security guard Veatrice Rice, whom I discovered only after she died of cancer. Someday, I hope to be remembered as Jimmy remembers Veatrice [...]
… but it’s even better to win both my categories in the “prestigious” Drysdale Awards for blogging! First, I’d like to thank the little people. So, thank you, Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman!
Danny and Rhea
Also, thanks to all the blogging and non-blogging bitches who voted for me, albeit under duress. I will treasure my [...]
Continue reading about It Was an Honor Just to Be Nominated…





