Sunday, January 15, 2012
I’m giving my newly invented Best Dressed/Wear What You Want combo award for the Golden Globes red carpet to Piper Perabo. The oversize skirt made her sheer ballgown from Theyskens’ Theory Spring 2012 collection fit for a queen.
This is the kind of red-carpet dressing I like. Beautiful, risky and totally memorable. Designer Olivier Theyskens’ work is made for the red carpet — which is appropriate because the red carpet made his career when he designed Madonna’s 1998 Oscar dress.
Quite a few of his piece since then have had a lasting impact on me, including his “birds” gown for Rochas in 2006 …
… and his chartreuse ombre for Nina Ricci in 2007. (Theyskens goes through jobs like I go through Cadbury Dairy Milk bars.)
Piper’s dress is so spectacular that I forgive her muddy-looking makeup and strange facial expressions. If I were wearing such a majestic dress, maybe I’d say “fuck it” to all the other elements too.
Her dress was certainly the only one of the many pale dresses that stood out. The vast number of blush, pale pink, and other barely-there colors reminded me of the cement color that dominated the Oscar red carpet in 2010. Dull, dull, dull. If I were there, I would much rather be wearing Sarah Michelle Gellar’s monstrous tie-dyed Monique Lhuillier gown than blending in with the boring crowd. Speaking from personal experience, it’s more fun to wind up on the worst-dressed list than be overlooked. Welcome to my world, Sarah Michelle!
Speaking of bad, why is Kelly Osbourne a part of E!’s Fashion Police? I didn’t see her walk the red carpet, but when she was sitting down, all the focus was on her lavender-ish hair and cartoonish forearm tattoos and all I could think was, “Poor thing! A purple Care Bear threw up on her!” Her look wasn’t interestingly confrontational or personality-driven in a Wear What You Want style icon way. It was just … stuffed animal. What would Joan Rivers say?